Causing Heartbreak Page 5
“Oh, and before I forget the television is kind of tricky. There are like six remotes, so make the boys show you how to work it.”
“Okay, you guys have fun.” And pray for me is what I wanted to say.
“Thanks, Wren,” Layla gave me a little hug before they walked out the door. It didn’t feel weird. They were truly sweet, genuine people.
Let’s hope they had sweet kids.
THERE WERE TWO NEW VOICEMAILS ON my phone when I got off work. Both were probably from my parents. It was an everyday thing. The constant phone calls to make sure I was safe, and that I would be straight home after work. I had to hand it to them, they had the worrying parent’s role down to an art form. Instead of listening to the message and calling them back, I just shut my phone and tossed it in the empty passenger seat of my truck. All I wanted to do was go home, have a shower, and curl into bed. Whatever they had to tell me could wait until I got there.
Mrs. Lane’s supermarket was my primary job, and I had been working there ever since we moved into town. It wasn’t the greatest job, but it was a getaway for me. Dad had been driving the hour long trip to his office for over a year, so when the opportunity arose for us to move here, we did. Without hesitation. I promised the folks that once we settled in here that I’d go back to school, but we moved here in the middle of the semester. Then when it came time for me to register for school I decided that I would take one more semester off. I had to fight them on it, but I wasn’t exactly sure what I wanted to do. They expected so much from me.
I can’t be everything that they want me to be. I’m not smart enough to be a doctor like my dad, and I’m not patient enough to be a nurse like my mom. The medical field is not something I would ever consider.
I’ve never been sure of what I wanted to do.
I was content with just being average.
Normal.
But normal was not in my parent's vocabulary.
Being an average Joe wasn’t good enough. Not that they looked down on the average Joe, they just set high standards for me.
I either had to do as they wished or move out and support myself.
I guess it wasn’t too much to ask, but I was so ready to move out. The constant calls and texts made it that much worse, but until I got a better paying job I had to stick it out.
When I pulled into the driveway, there was a little white car parked there. It was after ten and I didn’t recognize the car. It was unusual for my parents to have guests over at this hour of the night. At least on weeknights.
I hit the garage door opener to open the last door, and waited as it lifted. The third one was mine. The headlights of my truck lit up the inside and I realized that Mom’s Range Rover was gone.
I didn’t think too much about it. She could have just ran to the market. Shit. That’s probably why she was calling. She was going to kill me.
I opened the door to go inside and all the lights were off, even the kitchen. Dad was probably in his office working, but I didn’t hear the boys. When I walked past Mom and Dad’s room, the door was closed, so I headed straight upstairs for a shower. Usually, Mom could hear me creeping through the hall no matter how quiet I tried to be. She was certainly not home. There was no sneaking past that woman, and who the hell that white car belonged to was beyond me.
My shower was record timing. All I wanted to do was get my ass to bed. I threw on a pair of boxers and hurried downstairs to tell them goodnight.
Still no lights.
Nothing.
I stood in the kitchen and poured a glass of milk. I was trying my best to be quiet, when I heard someone cough.
I stood there for a moment glancing in the direction of the family room. At first I thought my ears were just playing tricks on me.
Then I heard it again.
I peeked around the door frame and didn’t see anything. The T.V. was on, which I hadn’t realized before. When I reached down for the remote on the end table, I saw her.
A girl, asleep on my couch.
What the hell?
I stepped up to the side of the couch and leaned over so I could see her face.
“Wren,” I said lightly. It was her.
My girl.
Wait…
What am I thinking?
She moved so that her back was flush against the couch and I could plainly see her face. She looked freaking gorgeous. All of that red hair flowing around her.
I inched closer to her.
Her eyes opened suddenly and I was caught.
“HOLY SHIT!” she screamed and rose up quickly.
“I’M SORRY!” I yelled and jumped back equally as quick.
“YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?” She screamed again.
“I LIVE HERE!”
Her eyes were big. “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?” I countered. Still shouting.
“BABYSITTING!” Her girly voice was still screaming at me.
“OKAY! WHY ARE YOU STILL YELLING?” I smiled.
“BECAUSE YOU ARE?” She smiled back. She actually smiled back. She had an amazing smile. I hadn’t seen it until now. Not a genuine one anyway.
Her breathing slowed after a few minutes, and the redness that lightly covered her face gradually faded. Even though she was just riled up from a peaceful sleep, she still looked unbelievable.
Un-freaking-believable.
“Ouch,” she winced as she bent over holding her stomach. She was in pain.
“OH MY GOD! Are you okay?” I reached for her arm and bent down next to her. I didn’t know what to do. She was pregnant. I didn’t know the first thing about pregnant women.
She raised her head up and laughed a loud gravely laugh right in my face.
“Just kidding,” she said and batted her lashes in my direction.
I could feel the steam roll from my ears.
“WHAT THE FUCK!” I growled. “You scared me to death.” I placed my free hand over my chest where my heart felt like it was beating out of me.
“Doesn’t feel too good, does it?” Her mouth grew tight, and her eyes scowled right into mine. All the while her cheeks were fighting back a smile. “You don’t sneak up on a girl when she’s sleeping, especially in a stranger’s home.”
I sighed and tried to re-gain control over my erratic breathing. This girl was beyond difficult. She was on a whole other playing level.
“Now we’re even.” She said.
She tossed her loose red hair over her shoulder.
“Fine, but that wasn’t funny.”
She was still laughing. She obviously thought it was.
I sat down on the edge of the couch and felt her move her legs back. I didn’t care if I was invading her space. If I had it my way, I’d be all the way in her space and up in her Kool-Aid. If she spared me one little tiny inch, I would take an entire mile.
Little fireball.
“I had no idea that you were going to be here. Where are my parents?” I asked, still trying to wrap my head around all of it. I wondered why my father never mentioned her coming.
Unless…
That was probably the message still beeping on my phone that I never checked.
“They had a date night, and your father hired me last week to watch the boys on a full-time basis. He thought tonight would be a good night for me to babysit and get to know them a little better. To make sure that I could handle the job.”
Lucky me.
“I didn’t know that he was your dad.” She pulled her knees up as close as she could get them to her, despite her bulging belly. Her cute bulging belly.
“I’m surprised you couldn’t tell. Most people say we look alike.”
“I see it a little, but I didn’t put two and two together. I should have just figured, since the other day at the office.”
“You’ve been thinking about that day too.” I winked at her.
“Easy Casanova.” She folded her arms across her chest.
“I just can’t help myself.”
“Well, you need to start.”
“Fine,” I sighed. “I’ll try my best, but those eyes.” I rolled my head to the side to look at her.
“Really,” she reached over and pinched the hell out of my arm.
“Ouch, dammit.”
“That’s what you get.”
“Okay, on a serious note. What did you think? Are you going to keep the job?”
She shook her head yes. “Yeah. I think I am. The boys were great.”
“I don’t believe that for a minute.”
“Well, they were. They even when right to bed when I asked, which surprised the hell out of me.”
“And now what. You’re sleeping on the job?” I tried to hide my smile.
“I had permission. Your mother said I could.” She stuck out her tongue in my direction.
“Did you really just stick your tongue out at me?”
“I saw Carter do it to Cooper. I’m a quick learner.” She shrugged.
Suddenly I wasn’t so tired anymore. I felt like I could sit there and talk with her for hours, and I was hoping that she’d let me. I didn’t want it to end. Especially since I had her talking and smiling. It was a big change from the other day. She was so stand-offish before. Eager to get me out of her line of fire. But not this time. She was willing to talk to me, and I was going to savor every last minute of it.
“What time did my parents say that they’d be home?”
“They said before midnight.”
Good. We still had over an hour before we would be interrupted.
I could have just let her go on home. At least that’s what I should have done, but I was being selfish. I wanted to learn more about her. I wanted to see what made that fiery girl tick. Wanted to know why she always had this deep saddening look on her face. It was there all the time. Lingering in her eyes. So distant, yet close enough that she couldn’t hide it. I knew that they were the thoughts that only my dad would ever hear, but making her smile through her gloom was something I knew I could do.
“Are you hungry?” I asked.
She didn’t answer but nodded her head.
“Good, me too. Let’s go see if we can find some food in this place.”
I reached out my hand to help her off the couch, but she didn’t take it. I didn’t push her. Every moment was different with her. I had to take baby steps.
She eyed me carefully, and I realized that I was still in my boxer shorts. No need to try and hide it now. All the goods were out there on the shelf, and I wasn’t ashamed. My body wasn’t that of a body builder or anything, but there was muscle there. She may have to look a little closer, but it was there.
She followed me into the kitchen, and I headed straight for the fridge. “What you want to eat?”
“Can you cook?”
“Yeah. I mean not real good, but yeah. I can whip us up something. What do you like? Do you eat lots of weird crazy things while you’re pregnant?”
She laughed a little, but it quickly dulled. She sat down on the barstool that was facing opposite me. “Not really, I crave a lot of sweets and drink a lot of milk.” She shrugged. “Other than that my appetite is no different. Seems, sometimes I eat less.”
Less. That doesn’t sound good. “Well, in this house we eat a lot. So be prepared.” I stood facing the inside of the refrigerator. The cold air felt good against my extra warm skin.
“Actually,” she hesitated.
I turned around to face her.
“Do you have any cereal?” She ran her fingers through the ends of her hair and stared at me. I watched her eyes as they scanned my chest for a long second before they finally reached my own. God it felt good.
I grinned and waited a minute before I spoke again. Her face reddened because she knew that she’d been caught staring. For once it wasn’t me that was doing the checking out. She was not the type of girl to ogle the goods. You could tell.
She fidgeted. “Well, do you?” She asked again. Her tone was clipped and she shuffled in her seat. I was loving every damn minute of it. So was my libido.
“Yep, we do.” Finally removing my bedroom eyes from her I opened the pantry doors. I peeked back at her over my shoulder and she was looking anywhere but in my direction. If I could peek inside her brain, I would imagine that she was arguing with herself. Her expression was strained. There was some kind of inner battle going on inside there and from that look I could tell that I was losing.
“Cocoa Puffs, or Captain Crunch?” I held out the boxes for her to decide.
“Cocoa Puffs,” She replied.
“Good choice.”
I took two bowls from the cabinet and poured the cereal inside. The room was suddenly far too quiet for my taste, and I was regretting that I had put her on the spot. I should never have let on that I had caught her staring at me. I’d made her uncomfortable, and I realized that I may never get back my chance to talk to her like before. I wanted her to feel comfortable around me. But that was going to take a lot more work than ten minutes of small talk. And I felt like me grinning like an idiot at her while she checked me out just put us three steps back in the wrong damn direction.
I’d never had to work hard at getting girls to talk to me.
Ever.
It was easy. I approach, make small talk, and we share a few laughs. It was easy and natural. Not with this one. She was going to make me work hard, and for only a mere friendship. Was she worth it?
I slid the bowl over in front of her and watched as she lifted the spoon to her mouth. She closed her eyes and savored it like it was a steak to a homeless man. For the first time in my life, I wished I were a spoon.
When she opened her eyes and looked in my direction, my mouth was hanging wide open. It was obvious that I was back to being the one doing the checking out. I quickly looked down inside my bowl.
When I glanced back up at her. Because I couldn’t help myself. She had that sad expression again. The one that just killed me every time I saw it. I just wanted to hug her. To ask her what happened to her. To tell her I was there and I would be her friend.
I knew that it wouldn’t do me any good. She was in another world. One that myself or anyone else for that matter didn’t belong in.
“Cocoa Puffs are my favorite.” She spoke lightly and if I hadn’t been listening hard, I wouldn’t have heard her.
I wanted to say mine too, but I didn’t want to say too much. The moment for small talk was over and I knew it. But she was giving me reassurance. Just enough. I smiled softly at her and finished eating my cereal.
The thought that someone or something had caused this girl so much pain, was too much to bare. I tried just pushing it into the back of mind. It seemed like what she needed was a friend. Someone that would just be there for her when she needed it. I could do that. Right?
It would take work, but when I asked myself again if she was worth it, the answer was obvious.
WHAT THE HELL WAS MY PROBLEM?
What the hell was my freaking problem?
I kept repeating the words over and over in my head. This guy was trouble. Not really trouble, but he made me act out of the ordinary. He made me look at him in ways that I was never supposed to do.
He didn’t actually make me, but he certainly made things harder. More complicated. It had been just weeks since Dane had passed away. He hadn’t even been dead a month. Already I was scoping out other guys. I was so disappointed in myself. I mean it wasn’t as if I wanted some kind of a relationship because that was the last thing on my mind. But the attraction alone was pushing me to my limits. It made my chest hurt and made me feel like I was betraying Dane in some sort of sleazy way.
I couldn’t look at him anymore. Not like that.
Staring into my bowl of milk I wished for an out. I wanted to get out of that kitchen, and away from the whole situation as fast as my legs would take me.
He never pushed anymore. He never tried to strike up a conversation and I was grateful. After the awkwardness of my lingering eyes, I wa
sn’t so sure this was the right job for me. Although I loved those boys already. They were so much fun. We laughed and played, and they listened to me. It felt good. Rewarding.
But if seeing him every time I came over was part of my job requirements then I most likely was qualified for the job.
Bentley was so hot, in a lean, mysterious kind of way. He was everything Dane wasn’t. All these years of loving Dane, I hadn’t even looked at another guy the same way.
Until now.
This man had such an effect on me. He made my palms sweat. He made me fidgety and un-girly like. He made me laugh, when all I really wanted to do was cry. Those damn green eyes made me want to look so deeply into them that I’d get lost. But I don’t know him. I don’t know anything about him. He was foreign, and I was off limits.
Reality was that the thought of replacing Dane would kill me, and no matter how much my body reacted, my heart would always belong to Dane.
I heard Bentley stir in his chair and get up. He walked around the counter and placed his bowl into the dishwasher. He reached for my bowl and took it from where it sat in front of me.
“Finished, right?”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
He was about to say something else, when his parents walked in.
I plastered a smile on my face at the sight of the happy couple. I didn’t want them to know that I was feeling down or something was wrong. And I most certainly didn’t feel like getting the third degree from the Doctor. Although with his Jedi mind tricks, he could probably see right through me.
“Hey guys,” Layla said. She placed a wrapped up piece of tin foil on the counter. “Bentley Gregory Miller!” She shouted. “Go put some clothes on. We have a guest.”
I felt my cheeks flame. I was already used to seeing him like this. No sense in changing now.
Shut up! I growled at myself. These pregnancy hormones were going to be the death of me.
“Too late now. My goods have been on display since I scared the crap out of her earlier.” He smiled a big Crest commercial smile. “Would have been nice if someone had of told me that she was coming.”
“What would be nice, would be if you answered your cell phone once in a while. You would have known.” Doctor Miller reciprocated the same exact smile.