15 years to life Page 6

  I walked out behind her and took the seat next to her on the steps.

  “I guess I thought that having you back home meant that we’d catch up. That maybe the two of us would be tighter now than we ever were.” She admitted.

  “This is a two way street you know? You never talk to me about that boyfriend of yours.”

  “I know.” Her voice was heavy. “I didn’t think you’d understand.”

  She was right. In my eyes no one would ever be good enough for her.

  “Look, I promise I’ll talk to you about him later. I promise. But for now can’t you just tell me what’s going on?”

  I was about to answer her, about to spill my guts, when a fancy black car pulled up into Madeline’s driveway. A short, older guy stepped out of the car dressed in some high dollar suit carrying flowers. He must’ve felt my eyes glaring daggers, because he glanced in our direction, and gave us a quick nod of the head.

  “That’s the boyfriend,” Blaine said quietly.

  “That tool?”

  “Yep.”

  “I can’t compete with that. Those damn flowers probably cost more than my pre-paid cell phone.” I huffed.

  “I don’t know the guy, but I know that Maddie is not that superficial.”

  I watched the little dweeb kiss my girl when she opened the door for him. Their little public display was right there on the front porch for myself, and all the other neighbors to see. I had to look away before I did something stupid.

  “He was her excuse for not wanting to be with me, and the reason she ran away after I kissed her.” I admitted shamelessly. “She told me it was because she had a boyfriend. Which obviously wasn’t a lie. But then she told me that it could never happen again.” I almost laughed at the idea. “She said those words as if I’d try again.”

  “You so would.”

  “Maybe,” I laughed.

  Blaine scooted closer to me on the step. “I’m sorry Bubba.”

  I shrugged. “She got my first kiss.”

  “She should feel lucky.”

  I pulled Blaine closer and wrapped my arm around her. I tried not to let her see how much it bothered me. Deep down it was tearing me up, but she knew that. She always knew.

  After seeing the well-dressed-idiot-of-a-boyfriend, it made it that much more real. I’d wasted my time, and my first kiss on a girl that didn’t want anything to do with me.

  What was I saying? I didn’t really waste my first kiss. It was more perfect that I could have imagined. My poor ego was just broken, so I kept telling myself that it was all a waste. Maybe the more I said it; sooner or later I’d start believing it.

  “I know you probably don’t want my advice Bubba, but I think you should try to venture out. Maybe go on a date with someone else. I bet that it’d help take your mind off things. I know girls slip you their numbers all the time at the bar.” She winked.

  They did, but I never paid much attention, because my sights were always set on Madeline. From the moment she caught my eye, I hadn’t been able to think much about anyone else. Every day I felt one step closer to being with her. I didn’t want to settle for some random chick.

  “Maybe I will,” I said as I thought about the dick next door.

  “That’s the spirit.” She kissed my cheek. “Now come on. I’ve been dying to show you what you’re doing wrong in the kitchen.”

  “Wait. I haven’t been doing anything in the kitchen.” That was a lie. “I don’t use the dishwasher, and I don’t cook.”

  “Exactly.” She rolled her eyes. “And if you did cook, you’d be doing it wrong.”

  “Your mouth really has no filter.” I said, hoping I’d gotten that correct. I’d been trying to pick up on my sisters lingo, and I was getting pretty good at it. Well, sometimes. I suggest not saying “knocking boots,” because it doesn’t mean what you think it means.

  “What’s the point? I don’t care what people think of me.”

  “That must be a twin thing, because I don’t give a damn either.”

  That night Blaine showed me how to make basic spaghetti, and her secret to great Kool-Aid. The secret was more sugar.

  We laughed, and talked about old times or at least the good times we shared before Mom died. It was a nice break.

  And that night before I went to bed, I decided to text one of the girls that had given me her number at the bar. The only one that I could remember was Zoey –the blonde. That’s because she’d given me her number twice in one night. Once before she was drunk, and again later that same night.

  She texted me back and agreed to a date. I didn’t know who was the genius that invented texting, but it was perfect for someone like me. It was kind of idiot proof.

  Somewhere deep in the back of my mind, I still wanted to be with Madeline. She crossed my mind the moment that I texted Blondie.

  Dammit, those thoughts.

  Why did she have to be so gorgeous?

  Why couldn’t I picture the blonde girl? What was her name?

  No more thoughts of Madeline. No more.

  Zoey, that was her name.

  Zoey.

  Zoey.

  Zoey.

  I repeated her name over and over in my head, but it didn’t help. It was just one date. That was it. I could do it.

  Hopefully.

  Chapter Fourteen- Present

  Not knowing how to drive could really make a man feel like he had a vagina, instead of balls. I had to walk to pick up my date. Walk. It was pathetic. Thank goodness she didn’t live too far away or else I’d have more than one strike against me. Being sweaty wouldn’t win me any brownie point that’s for sure.

  Blaine helped me pick out something to wear before she left for work. For some unknown reason, I trusted her judgment. I should’ve known better. I felt ridiculous, but she said I looked good.

  No, no, no.

  The shirt was baby gorilla sized, and I needed king of the jungle. But guess who won? Of course she did.

  And guess who looked like he had his shirt painted on?

  Yep… Me.

  The material of the shirt felt like silky sheets or something. I argued that it had to be for women, but the tag said men.

  “She’ll love it,” she said. “Trust me,” she said.

  “Gag me.” That’s what I wanted to say.

  I knocked on Zoey’s door a few minutes early expecting her not to be ready, but I was wrong. She opened the door with her little jacket, and bag in hand. She was much cuter than I remembered. Reaching out her hand, she rubbed it along the front of my shirt. The slickness mixed with her tender touch felt amazing.

  “Nice shirt.” She winked.

  I silently thanked my sister.

  “The restaurant is only a couple of blocks away from here, do you mind walking?” I asked, hoping she would agree since I had no car. I didn’t want to appear completely worthless. There was a great chance that she’d never met someone my age that didn’t know how to drive.

  “Sure,” she answered in a sugary sweet voice.

  Just like that, my first real date was under way. I was more nervous than I expected. My insides felt like they were tied up in knots. The first few minutes that we walked next to each other on the sidewalk, we never spoke. My tongue felt like it was twisted, and nothing was ever going to come out right. She wasn’t as easy to talk to as Madeline was.

  Perfect Brian. I’d been with this girl for ten minutes, and already my mind was on someone else.

  “Are you from here?” She asked.

  “Yeah, born and raised,” I said, surprised that the words came out right. I realized that I probably shouldn’t have said raised. I only lived with my family until the age of eleven. That was certainly not a subject I was willing to discuss at any point during this night. “You’re not from Kentucky are you?” I pointed out. Her voice was so much different.

  “You’re good.” She smiled. “Most people can’t tell. I’ve been here for about four years now, but my accent still isn’t as thick as
most peoples.”

  “I wouldn’t have guessed that you’ve lived here that long.”

  “I have.” She added a little southern twang when she spoke.

  “No,” I shook my head. “That doesn’t sound like you at all.”

  She gave my arm a little shove, and I liked it. I liked the playfulness in her. Besides my kiss with Madeline, this was the most interaction I’d ever had with a woman. A man could get used to being touched, I’ll tell you that.

  Jesus! Again with Madeline, I couldn’t get her off my brain.

  Luckily Zoey started to feel more comfortable, because the rest of the walk to the restaurant she nearly talked my ear off. Once she started, there was no stopping her. I couldn’t have been happier. All I had to do was flash her an occasional grin, and nod my head. I was as cool as a cucumber.

  I was even cooler once I asked the waiter to seat us outside of instead of in. It was too nice of a night to be huddled up in a small corner inside. She continued to talk about how great the place was, and how they had the best food. I could still barely get a word in. She reminded me of a kid who was jacked up on some candy or something. Talking wasn’t my thing so she was complete opposite of what I’d look for in a woman. But on the outside she completely made up for it.

  When the waiter came back to the table and took our drink orders, Zoey decided to have something a lot stronger than me. I wasn’t an alcohol drinker. I’d never even tried it before. I probably could have gotten my hands on some good stuff while I was in prison, especially in the last place I was at, but I was trying too hard to get out. I didn’t need another reason for them to keep me. Now after working the bar, I realized that nothing good ever came from getting wasted. Between the actual vomiting, and the “word vomit” as Blaine called it, there was no way I was going to let myself get like that.

  “Thanks for inviting me out tonight. I would have just been studying all night if you hadn’t called.”

  “What are you going to school for?”

  “A pharmacy technician. Weren’t you listening?” Her voice sounded angry.

  “Uh,” Shit. Listening was probably on the top of Blaine’s –make me a prince charming list. I should have let her teach me after all. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay. I was just teasing you.” The frown lines softened on her forehead. “I know that sometimes I talk too fast, and it’s hard to keep up.”

  “You’re fine. It’s not you. My mind wanders off sometimes.” On things it shouldn’t, was what I wanted to say. “I really am sorry.”

  She rested her hand on the top of my thigh under the table. “It’s really okay.” She said.

  Oh, it was going to be more than okay if this night kept going like this.

  “You should try a little sip of my drink. It’s really good.” She eyed me over the rim of her glass.

  The way her lips hugged that straw was making it hard for me to focus. It was so hard. Every fucking thing was hard. Maybe I wasn’t the best person at reading people, but I had no doubt in my mind that she was doing that on purpose. She moved the straw slowly across her lips, and pulled it out. Her tongue brushed across her top lip in an agonizing pace. She was slow and steady. It was enough to drive me insane.

  “I’ll try a taste.” Please get what I’m saying here. It wasn’t just her drink that I wanted to taste.

  She passed me the drink and I took a small sip. “Mmm.” It was really good. One more sip wouldn’t hurt.

  Boy was I wrong. Five drinks later and I felt like I was soaring high above the clouds. My body was on fire, and I couldn’t sit still. I didn’t mean to drink so much, or to drink at all for that matter, but it tasted so sweet. It was much sweeter than my tea.

  My body was kind of tingly, but my mind felt fine. The biggest thing was the noise. Everything seemed louder, and a couple times I felt like I was yelling. But she laughed and so did I. I was feeling great.

  Sometime after the second drink, whatever her name was (because I couldn’t think of it at the time) had scooted her seat next to mine.

  Best move of the night.

  I couldn’t seem to keep my hands off of her, and she didn’t mind one single bit. Her hands were all over me too.

  I read a book when I was about seventeen about a girl like her. In the book they called her easy, because she had sex with the guy on the first date. I loved it. I loved that damn dirty book. I didn’t realize I could get an easy girl for my own. I was Ethan, the guy with the easy girl. Lets hope that I learned a thing or two from the beast in the bedroom, Ethan.

  “You want to skip the meal, and hang out at my place?” She asked.

  The warmth of her voice against my ear was it for me. I didn’t want to just hang out. I wanted to knock her boots off. “Abso-fucking-lutely.”

  We were out of the place in no time, once I got my legs to work right. It was harder to walk on wobbly legs than I realized.

  When I reached for easy girl’s hand on the walk back, she took it immediately. In fact, she snuggled into my side as we stumbled down the sidewalk. The closeness was incredible, her body was incredible, and the booze was making me fearless.

  As soon as we walked up to the steps of her place and she opened the door, I picked her up off the ground and tossed her over my shoulder. It wasn’t the best idea I’ve ever had, even though she barely weighed anything. But you know me, king of unwise decisions. It was hard enough trying to stand on my own two feet, but having her over my shoulder sent us stumbling into the wall. She was still laughing though, so I guess I didn’t give her a concussion.

  “Last door on the right.” She called out as she slapped her hand against my ass.

  This was going to be my night.

  When I opened the door, it led me right into her bedroom. I knew right away that this was my cave of wonders. The sex was about to happen.

  Oh please let it happen.

  It only took about two seconds, once her feet hit the ground, that she attacked me. Her lips were all over me.

  She wanted it.

  I wanted it.

  There was no holding back now.

  She wasn’t going to let feelings get in the way. Hell, there were no feelings, except for the throbbing between my legs.

  “I want you.” She said as she unzipped my pants.

  This was it.

  “I want you too.” No lie. I did. I wanted her so bad.

  I pulled my shirt off over my head and slung it across the room. She did the same, and she was bare naked under hers too. How did I not notice that before? Her boobies were huge. They were perfect. These were the fake ones. They had to have been. I’d seen pictures in magazines.

  I didn’t know what to do first so I went with my instincts. I licked them, and kissed them, and sucked them. She tasted kind of salty, but I couldn’t get enough. She liked it too. The cries that came out of her mouth almost made me come undone.

  As fast as I could, I pushed my jeans down. I needed to touch her with every part of my body. I wasn’t going to last long, but I also wasn’t going to wait long to be inside of her.

  Thank God for the books I read. I knew what to do with the most important part of my body. The rest would just have to suck. I wasn’t apologizing though. Her moans proved that she liked what was I was doing.

  Her tiny hands ran down my stomach until she found what she was looking for. My eyes rolled back in my head so far that I could almost see behind me. I would say that it felt good, but it was better than good. She rubbed me, just like I rubbed myself when I was alone. Only it was different this time. It was better when someone else did it, a million times better. It made my whole body shake. I felt like a ticking bomb that was about to explode.

  “FUCK!” I screamed out.

  I picked her up and threw her onto the bed. I watched as she slid her pants down and kicked them off the bed. This was a dream. A glorious wet dream.

  I was all over the place like a wild dog. I wanted to touch her, kiss her, and bite her. I climbed on top o
f her, and stared down at her amazing body.

  “You’re gorgeous.” I said and I meant it.

  She rose up and kissed my lips hard, pulling me down above her.

  I touched her with my hands all over. I rubbed her chest, and her thigh, and moved my way to her center. It was so wet. Was she supposed to wet? I wasn’t about to ask. I rubbed up and down not knowing if I was doing what I should, but she kept saying, “yes, yes, yes.” I rolled with it.

  “I got to have you now.”

  My head was swimming, and my legs were shaking. If I didn’t do this now, I’d still be a virgin tomorrow.

  “Hold on.” She said as she reached over to her nightstand drawer. “Condom,” she smiled.

  “Good thinking.” There sure didn’t need to be any more clones of me running around in this world.

  She handed me the packet and I froze. I didn’t know how to put the damn thing on.

  Think Brian.

  “You do it for me.” I growled. I could take control. After all, I was a beast, a scared shitless beast.

  She took it from my hands.

  “Lay down.”

  All hell.

  I liked it better when she took control, and I was not afraid to admit it.

  She climbed on top of me and did her thing. Condoms suck, by the way.

  I didn’t know if it was the alcohol causing the crazy sensations or if it was just the fact that she was sitting on top of me. I couldn’t seem to wrap my head around it all. Then the moment she positioned herself on top of me and lowered herself down, I was a complete mess. I closed my eyes and tried to slow my breathing, but I couldn’t. I was addicted already. The feel of myself inside of her was not real. It couldn’t have been. They didn’t describe it like this in the books. She was warm and tight, and her insides squeezed against me.

  “Holy shit, incredible.” Those were my words.

  “You feel so good.” She said through heavy breaths.

  Then she moved up and down on top of me. Each time she came down, I thought it wasn’t just my dick that was going to explode. My whole body was going to come apart.